Invisible
by Hazydestiny
Summary: Rocky has to deal with losing the power - but will he lose his best friend as well?
1. Invisible Man

_**Disclaimer:** In my dreams the power rangers belong to me, and the males aren't allowed to wear shirts and spend their days giving me massages and feeding me grapes. (Other than Justin, all clothing is required for him) But alas, when I awake I am back in the real world, where I don't own any of them, they belong to Saban/Disney. Dreaming is so much more fun. "Invisible Man" belongs to 98*, who once again, I do not own. Damn. _

**Author's notes:** This is my first independent fanfic; you can find the rest of my work with my darling co-author IvyDraken (who I thank profusely for proofing this). I haven't yet decided whether this is just a singular songfest or the start of something more. That's up to you guys! Please review and let me know! Also note that italics indicate thoughts. Or lyrics, but I think you can tell the difference. 

**Time:** This takes place during Turbo, before "Passing of the Torch." In my little world two months have gone by.

**Invisible Man  
By: Hazydestiny**

The lights were already dimming when Rocky slipped into a seat at the back of the theater. He could see his friends sitting in the front row. Nice of you to save me a seat. Not that he would've sat with them anyway. _I'm not exactly part of the team anymore. The only time I see them is when they come to the apartment, and I know they're not coming to see me. He sighed. I love Adam, but I really gotta get my own place._

It had been two months since he had graduated high school and given his powers to Justin. God only knew how he let Zordon talk him into that. At first the rangers had been the supportive, loving friends he was so used to, but their attention had quickly waned. They were busy with other things - Tommy was always at the track, Tanya was working at a radio station and trying to get her singing career off the ground, Adam was swamped teaching martial arts, coaching soccer, and preparing for college, and Kat spent practically all of her time dancing. Not to mention the whole saving-the-world bit. And the little free time they did have was spent trying to be a surrogate family for Justin. He didn't even fit into their lives anymore. He sighed. _Funny how they spent so much time with Billy after he lost the powers, but a few months go by and I've dropped off the face of the earth._

The music swelled, and the first dancers floated onto the stage. Rocky closed his eyes and let Tchaikovsky's melodies ease his tension. His mom used to play "Sleeping Beauty" as a lullaby when he was younger, and it always brought back warm feelings of home. Opening his eyes, he tried to concentrate on the ballet, but his eyes kept drifting to that front row. He noticed Jason and Emily had joined them. Typical. There was another former ranger they spent a significant amount of time with. _Tommy has no problem having a conversation with him, but when I'm around it's like there's a huge elephant in the room. Nice to know that the friends I spent so much time with can't find anything to talk to me about. God, why am I here anyway?_

That question was quickly answered as he looked back up at the stage. There she was, his angel. She seemed to float across the stage, and every other dancer faded into the background. Her face was radiant; her blond hair sparkled under the lights, her pale skin looked like cream. Her beauty was so intoxicating he could barely breathe. How much would he love to run his fingers through that hair, to feel her soft skin under his hands! How many nights had he dreamed of kissing those perfect lips? He never knew what beauty was until the day that he met her. _Not like I ever had a chance in hell._

He sighed. He should really stop torturing himself. She would never see him as anything more than a friend, and a goofy one at that. When it came to matters of the heart, she had someone much better to turn to. Mr. Perfect. The man who got everything without even so much as raising a finger. She had been stuck on that man since the very beginning, since the first day that they met. Rocky knew from the start that he would sooner have a shot of single-handedly defeating Divatox than ever winning her heart. But in this world of music and fantasy, he could dream. 

_ You can hardly wait to tell all your friends   
How his kisses taste sweet like wine   
And how he always makes your heart skips a beat   
Every time he walks by   
And if you're feeling down, he'll pick you up   
He'll hold you close when you're making love   
He's everything you've been dreaming of   
Oh, baby  
I wish you'd look at me that way   
Your beautiful eyes looking deep into mine   
Telling me more than any words could say   
But you don't even know I'm alive   
Baby to you, all I am, is the invisible man   
_

He got so lost in her perfection that he didn't even notice the time passing, and in what seemed like seconds the curtains were closing. Thunderous applause echoed off the walls of the theatre. The dancers, tired and elated, came out for their curtain calls. When she finally walked out the audience rose to its feet. The volume doubled, mainly due to the whistling and cheering of the front row. Rocky added a few whistles of his own, but that faded when Tommy jumped up on stage. He handed her a large bouquet of red roses. Her face shining, she pulled him down into a kiss, an act that excited the audience even more. Rocky, however, stood motionless, looking down at the simple wildflower arrangement he had brought. He thanked God for the darkness that hid the pain on his face. 

_ You probably spend hours on the phone   
Talking 'bout nothing at all   
It doesn't matter what the conversation   
Just as long as he calls   
Lost in a love so real and so sincere   
And you wipe away all those tears   
Your face lights up whenever he appears   
I wish you'd look at me that way   
Your beautiful eyes looking deep into mine   
Telling me more than any words could say   
But you don't even know I'm alive   
Baby to you, all I am, is the invisible man   
_

Turning to the man next to him, Rocky shoved the flowers into his hands. Ignoring the stranger's surprise, Rocky walked out the door. Once he got out of the building, he broke into a run. He ignored the pain in his back from his jarring steps, and just kept going, trying to outrun his pain. When he reached his apartment, he didn't even bother to turn on the lights. He collapsed on the couch, trying to catch his breath. _This shouldn't be so hard!! I've had to watch them together every day for years. God, is it ever going to get easier?_ Bowing his head, he buried his face in his hands. His entire life was in shambles at his feet, and he didn't know how much more his heart could take. Stretching out on the couch, he let it all go. In the dark silence of his home he sobbed out all of his anger, fear, and pain. Finally, emotionally spent and completely exhausted, he drifted into a dreamless sleep. 

_ I wish you'd look at me that way   
Your beautiful eyes looking deep into mine   
Telling me more than any words could say   
But you don't even know I'm alive   
Baby to you, all I am, is the invisible man   
You don't see me girl but I love you, yes, I love you   
The invisible man   
_


	2. Memories of Brotherhood

_**Disclaimer:** Rocky and Adam do not belong to me, I just like to borrow them to play with. In the real world they belong to Saban/Disney. (Someday, I tell you…it will all be mine!! *evil laughter*) _

**Author's notes:** Just a warning, this chapter doesn't really go with the tone of the last one. But I love Rocky/Adam, and I so had to do it. I have to thank my darling Ivydraken, who is my co-author and dearest friend, and without whom these characters as you read them would not exist. As you read, italics indicate internal thought. Please, please, please review!!! 

**Time:** This takes place during Turbo, before "Passing of the Torch." In my little world two months have gone by. 

**Memories of Brotherhood  
by: Hazydestiny**

Adam turned on the lights as he walked into the apartment. The sight of Rocky sprawled on the couch greeted him, and he sighed. The tear stains were evident on his best friend's face. He started untying Rocky's shoes, talking to him as he did so. "I really wish you would talk to me, Rock. It's not like I haven't noticed that you've been having a tough time. But every time I ask you about it you tell me everything's fine!" He sighed again, laying a blanket over his best friend. _We used to talk about everything._

With a final glance at the still figure on the couch Adam headed to his room. He pulled off his clothes and lay back on his bed. _I'm worried about you, Rocky. Why are you pushing me out of your life?_

Adam couldn't remember a time when Rocky wasn't in his life. They had grown up on the same street, and their mothers had been best friends, so it was only natural that they boys spent all of their time together. Aisha had joined the duo in elementary school, but Rocky and Adam had always had a bond that she wasn't part of. She had known that, and accepted it. The three of them always had a great time together, but it was Rocky and Adam who were inseparable. _ He's always been there for me, no matter what. And I sure as hell needed someone to pick up the pieces._ He closed his eyes as a memory coursed through him. 

(1986) 

Adam tried not to make a sound as he slipped out of his house. He gritted his teeth and pushed through the pain, running down the street to Rocky's. Climbing up the tree to the roof, he knocked on a window. It was opened, and he slipped inside. 

Finally safe, he dropped onto the bed and curled up in a ball, sobs racking his small body. Rocky lay down directly behind him, wrapping his arms around the distraught boy. "Was he really bad?" Adam nodded, burrowing closer to his friend. Rocky just made soothing noises until the sobbing quieted. "Better?" Adam nodded, and sat up as Rocky pulled away. "Okay, off with it." 

The Korean boy pulled off his shirt, noticing Rocky's wince as he observed the welts and bruises that covered the 8-year-old's body. Following their usual routine, Rocky got up and walked to the bathroom, returning with a warm washcloth. He gently ran it over Adam's body, cleaning up the dried blood that had leaked from the wounds. 

Adam sat silently, yielding to his best friend's ministrations. He didn't know what he'd do without the safe haven Rocky provided him with. The entire DeSantos family was so wonderful that whenever he was in their presence he could almost forget what a nightmare his own life was. He sucked in a breath as the cloth rubbed over a particularly sore spot. 

Rocky pulled away. "I'm sorry! Are you okay?" Adam nodded, and Rocky gently returned to his duty. "Was he drunk?" 

Adam let out a bitter laugh. "Why would he have to be drunk? He has no problem doing this when he's sober." 

Rocky put down the cloth and picked up the antiseptic salve. "I know. But it's usually worse when he's drunk." He began spreading the cooling gel over Adam's wounds. "Is your mom okay?" 

Adam sighed. "I think so. It scares me sometimes, how calm she is. I know she gets it worse than I do." He closed his eyes at Rocky's gentle massage. 

"She's strong. Just like you." 

A lingering tear slid down Adam's cheek, and he closed his eyes to stop the deluge that threatened to follow. "I don't feel very strong." Rocky quickly wrapped Adam in his arms as a second set of tears overflowed. "God, Rocky, what would I do without you?" 

Rocky gently rubbed his back. "You'll never have to find out." 

(1997) 

Adam rolled on his side and picked up the picture that sat next to his bed. It was of him and Rocky, goofing around in the Youth Center. That was before the accident, before Rocky had lost his powers, before the chasm had been formed between them. But Adam knew that he had to hold on. _ I need you. And I know you need me. I'm not letting you walk away from us._

Of course, he had no idea what Rocky was going through. He still had the power. It had become a form of security, a constant energy that surged through his body like blood. He couldn't comprehend having that ripped away, it gave him a sick feeling just thinking about it! And couple all of the pain and physical therapy that Rocky had to got through… Adam had so much respect for how his friend had handle the situation. He had barely ever complained. 

Then to be replaced by Justin! It was enough that the rest of the team was furious about it, he couldn't imagine how Rocky felt. True, Adam liked Justin, and there were certain assets he brought to the team, but he sure as hell wasn't anywhere close to Rocky. And that had to be an ego-crusher for the former blue ranger, seeing his place taken by a 12-year-old. Another thing Adam couldn't relate to. 

_But it doesn't matter if I can't relate! We've always been there for each other. It's not like he knew how it felt to live with a fucking asshole that beat you all the time…and worse. But he was there for me through it all. Just like I was there for him…_

(1990) 

Adam found Rocky sitting in his backyard on the hammock. He sat down next to him, not saying a word. He just put his arms around his best friend. Rocky leaned against him. They sat in silence for a long time. Finally Rocky spoke. "It's not fair." 

Adam sighed. "I know it's not." 

"What are we going to do, Adam? There's no way Mama can support all eight of us on her own! And my paper route doesn't exactly bring in big bucks." 

"Your mom's smart. She'll figure something out. And Aisha and I can help you and Juan take care of the kids." 

Rocky sighed. "I know." He gave his friend a teary smile. "Thanks for being here today. It means a lot, and not just to me. To the whole family." 

Adam smiled back. "What are friends for? Besides, you guys were so wonderful when my mom died. I owed you." 

Rocky hugged him. "You don't owe me anything, Adam." 

The smaller boy looked at him, fear in his eyes. "Don't I? If it wasn't for me…" 

Rocky quickly cut him off. "Stop it. It is not your fault that my dad died. You heard the police report. It was a drunk driver." 

Adam gave him an exasperated look. "My dad **wrote** that police report. We both know what happened. Your dad confronted my dad, and my dad shut him up. Just like he shut my mom up." A tear ran down his face. "It's not enough that my life is crap, he has to ruin the lives of the people I care about." He pulled away. "I should just leave." 

Rocky grabbed his arm. "I don't want you to leave. This isn't your fault, Adam. You didn't ask to have an asshole for a father." 

"But I'm just putting the rest of your family in danger by getting them involved with my life. It would be safer if I walked away now, before someone else gets killed." 

"No." Rocky looked at him with pleading eyes. "You can't. I need you, Adam. Now more than ever." A tear ran down his face. "Please. I couldn't take it if you left." Another tear. "I can't lose you too." 

Adam knew he couldn't walk away from that. Sitting back on the hammock, he pulled Rocky into his arms. "Shhh…I'm here." 

Rocky pulled him close, sobbing into his chest. "Promise me you'll never leave. Promise you'll be my best friend forever." 

Adam rubbed his back soothingly. "I promise, Rocko. I promise." 

(1997) 

Adam sighed. _We relied on each other so much. What happened?_ He hated feeling like he and Rocky were drifting apart. Rocky had always been his family, even more than Aisha. And he knew that it was hard for Rocky to let him be a support, when Rocky had been the strength of the relationship for so long. 

_He sacrificed everything for me - leaving his family, moving to Angel Grove. And he never complains about not talking to them, about missing the last three years with them. Hell, if it wasn't for him, I'd be dead right now…_

(1994) 

The first thing Adam became aware of was the familiar smell of sterilization. He slowly opened his eyes, squinting against the stark white of the hospital room. His heart sank as he realized he had failed once again. "Fuck." 

"You're welcome," a tired voice replied. 

Adam's eyes drifted towards the source of the sound. Rocky sat in the only chair in the small room. His face was pale, his eyes bloodshot with dark bags under them. "You look like crap," he said. 

"Finding your best friend lying in a pool of blood does tend to make one lose a night's sleep." 

A wave of guilt swept over Adam at the hurt in his best friend's voice. He averted his eyes, studying the stitches in his wrists. "You weren't supposed to find me." 

"You're lucky it was me that found you. I wouldn't have wanted 'Sha to see you like that, and your father wouldn't have been nearly as understanding." Rocky stood and walked over to stand beside the bed. "Adam, you promised." 

Adam closed his eyes. "Rock…" 

Rocky held up a hand. "I don't want to hear excuses. This is partly my fault too. I should've gotten you out of there a long time ago." 

Adam looked at him in confusion. "Gotten me out of there?" 

"I…" Before he could finish the sentence, the door opened. Rocky turned to look at the doctor who entered, and a smile spread across his face. "Dr. Oliver!" 

She smiled. "I see our patient is awake. How are you feeling, Adam?" 

"Fine," he said quietly. 

"I'm Dr. Oliver, one of the staff doctors here at Angel Grove General." 

Adam looked at her in confusion, then at Rocky, who had a grin on his face. "Angel Grove?" 

"Dr. Oliver is helping Aisha and I to find a three-bedroom apartment that we can afford. And to enroll in Angel Grove High School. She's even offered to have her son show us around. He's the same age as us." 

Adam was doubly confused. "What?" 

Dr. Oliver laughed. "Why don't I check you out, and then I'll let Rocky fill you in on what he's done. You've got quite an amazing best friend, Adam." 

"So it seems," Adam murmured. He subjected to the check-up, throwing impatient glances at Rocky throughout. 

"OK, everything checks out. I want to keep you another night just because I'm going to release you straight from here. I should really check you into the psych ward for a few days, but I have a feeling Rocky and Aisha will take good care of you." She smiled at Rocky. "I'll be back in a few hours." 

Adam waited until she had closed the door behind her, then fixed curious eyes on Rocky. "What is going on here? Why are we in Angel Grove? And why are we looking for an apartment?" 

Rocky pulled the chair close to Adam's bed and sat down. "We're moving here." 

Adam stared at him. "We? Who is we? Your family?" 

"No. You, Aisha and I. We're running away from home." 

Adam was struck speechless for a few minutes. Finally he choked out, "How?" 

"Well you didn't know this, and I just found out a few months ago, but Lily left money with my Mom. Money for you." 

Adam felt his heart jump, as it always did at the mention of his mother. "And she gave it to you?" 

"Yep. Plus, access to my savings account. And Aisha has that money from her grandmother that she's been saving." 

"So then yours and Aisha's parents know where we are?" 

Rocky shook his head. "No. The less they know the safer they are. Aisha and I are going to cut off all contact from our families." 

Adam gaped at him. "I can't let you do that!! Your families are so important to you, and…" 

"You're important to us. We're tired of watching that bastard put you through hell. I'm tired of saving you from these suicide attempts. I will do whatever I have to to keep you alive." 

Adam looked down at his hands, blinking back tears. "Rocky, I'm not worth it…" 

Rocky took Adam's hand. "Yes, you are." He sighed. "What is it going to take for you to realize how important you are to me? You've always been there for me, Adam. You're more of a brother to me than my blood brothers are! Please, let me do this for you." 

Adam nodded, a lump in his throat. Unable to speak, he squeezed Rocky's hand to show his appreciation. _What did I ever do to deserve him?_

Rocky perched on the side of the bed and put his arm around his best friend. "Just think, you and me living in an apartment together." He looked at Adam with a twinkle in his eyes. "You know you're never to set foot in the kitchen, don't you?" 

Adam let out a half-laugh, half-sob. "I'm not that bad." 

"Not that bad? You nearly burned my house down!" Rocky laughed, gently giving Adam a squeeze. "We're gonna be just fine. You and I can do anything." 

Adam gave him a smile, the first real one he had had in months. "Anything," he echoed. 

(1997) 

The Green Turbo Ranger sat up in his bed. "What the hell am I doing up here? Rocky needs me right now, whether he's ready to admit it or not. And whether he wants it or not, I'm going to be there for him. Just like he was always there for me." 

Opening his door he ran downstairs to the couch where his best friend was sleeping. Pulling the blanket off Rocky, he shook him. The sleeping man opened his eyes and looked at Adam groggily. "Wha…" 

"Come on, Rock. It's time to go to bed." 

Rocky pushed Adam away. "I am in bed." 

Adam pulled the unwilling man up. "No, there's no room for me there. We're going to your bed." 

Rocky looked at him uncomprehendingly as they walked down the short corridor to his room. "What?" 

"Come on. You need this." Pulling the former ranger onto the bed with him, Adam wrapped his arms around him. 

Rocky didn't protest. Instead, he snuggled into his best friend's arms. "Been a long time since we did this," he commented sleepily. 

"I know. I'm sorry." 

Rocky was silent for a few moments, and Adam almost thought he was asleep until he spoke again. "Adam?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Thanks." 

Adam smiled. "Anytime, Rock. That's what I'm here for." 

With that the two men drifted to sleep. 


	3. Friends of the Past

_**Disclaimer:** I do not own the Power Rangers. They belong to the great and powerful Saban/Disney. _

**Author's notes:** Thanks as always to my darling Ivydraken, who is my inspiration! Thanks also to Ty for reading this over and over until I got it right! Please review! 

**Time:** Two months after the Turbo movie, before "Passing the Torch." Rocky's dream is a memory of the day they became Rangers. 

**

Friends of the Past

  
by: Hazydestiny**

"Would you please not sit that close to the edge?" Rocky requested as he joined his friend, gesturing to the drop at the end of the bluff. 

"Sorry," Adam replied softly, scooting back a few feet. 

Rocky sat down next to him. "You took off pretty quickly after the party. What's up?" 

Adam shrugged. "Don't like parties." He traced a circle on the sandy ground with his finger. 

Rocky sighed. He hated when Adam got like this. Trying to get information out of him was like trying to pull a tooth out of the mouth of an angry bear. "Come on Adam, I know you. What's wrong?" 

Adam studied the ground, drawing a more intricate design. "Nothing." 

"Bullshit. Something's bothering you, and I'm not cooking another meal until you tell me what it is. And you'll have to deal with Aisha's mystery casseroles." 

That brought a small smile to Adam's face. "You mean when she throws all the food she can find together and cooks it?" 

"Scorches it is more like it," Rocky said with a grin. He nudged Adam. "So you better speak up." 

The smile disappeared from his best friend's face, and Adam looked seriously at him. "I don't think I can do this." 

"Don't you think it's a little late to change your mind now?" 

Adam stared at Rocky, his dark eyes troubled. "I'm not a superhero, Rocky. What makes me good enough to be a Power Ranger?" 

"You know, someday you're going to realize what an amazing person you are," Rocky said with a sigh. "Adam, you're going to be an incredible Ranger. You're incredibly skilled in martial arts, you're quick thinking and adaptable in a fight, and you honestly care about people. What part of that doesn't make you a good candidate to be a Ranger?" 

Adam shrugged again. "I just feel like you guys would be better off with someone else." 

"Hey." Rocky put his hand on Adam's shoulder. "We're a team. If you don't do this, 'Sha and I don't either." He assumed a very serious expression. "And I know you wouldn't want to deprive me of this experience, because my ass just looks so damn good in spandex." 

Adam burst out laughing. "You have a point there. I would never want to keep that from the world." 

Rocky grinned. "So are you in?" He held out his hand. 

Adam clasped it with a smile. "I'm in. As long as you're there." 

"Of course. We're a team!" 

"Right. You and me, forever." Adam pulled him into a hug. 

Rocky hugged him back. "Forever." 

**********

The phrase echoed in his mind as the dream faded into reality. Slowly Rocky became aware of the fact that someone was holding him. He smiled at the wave of comfort that swept through him. He was usually the one doing the holding; it felt nice to have the favor returned. Instinctively he moved closer to the warm body next to him. He heard a light laugh as the arm around him gave a light squeeze. "Good morning." 

He opened his eyes and looked into the deep brown ones of his best friend. He was about to return the greeting when reality sunk it. How long had it been since he and Adam had spent the night together? _A damn long while._ He sat up, staring at his bedmate in confusion. His mind ran through the reasons as to why he would find the younger man in bed with him, but he couldn't find one that made sense. "Adam? Is something wrong?" 

Adam gazed at him with piercing eyes. "I was going to ask you that." 

Rocky tensed and averted his eyes to avoid his friend's stare. _I hate it when he looks at me like that. I can never hide anything from him._ He swung his legs over the side of the bed, turning his back to Adam. "Why would you think something was wrong?" 

Adam sat up, stretching. "Don't give me that, Rocky. You've been moping around for two months, and I've tried to stay out of your way and leave you alone. But it's getting old." 

"Sorry to be such an annoyance," Rocky muttered. 

"That's not what I meant, and you know it. Don't put words in my mouth." Adam sighed. "Come on, I know that there's something wrong. I want to help, but I can't until you tell me what's going through your mind." 

"There's nothing to help with. I'm fine." 

"Bullshit." Rocky could feel Adam's gaze lancing through him. "Talk." 

The Hispanic boy stood up and crossed the room to his dresser. "If I do have a problem, I'll deal with it. It's not your concern." He opened a drawer, looking over the assorted shirts inside. 

"Not my concern? You're my best friend! Of course it's my..." 

Rocky cut him off. "Leave it alone, Adam." There was a dangerous tone in his voice, one that usually worked to repel his friend's curiosities. "I said I'm fine." Grabbing a shirt and his jeans he walked into the bathroom. 

To his annoyance, Adam didn't take the hint. The younger man followed him, leaning against the bathroom door. "Talk to me, Rock. We've always been able to talk about everything." 

Rocky spit out a mouthful of toothpaste. "We've. Contraction for we have. Isn't that past tense? How about we apply that to our friendship." 

The green turbo ranger winced. "That was harsh." He paused for a moment, and then decided to try a different angle. "I've been trying to give you space because you've obviously been having a tough time. I know that losing the power isn't easy…" 

Rocky turned on him with a vehemence that made Adam physically retreat from the bathroom. "Really? You know what I've been going through? Isn't that nice." His voice was laced with sarcasm. "How about you tell me about the time that you lost your powers?" 

"That's not the point..." 

"That's exactly the point. You have no idea how it feels. You have no idea how hard it is." He pulled on his shirt and headed into the kitchen. "You have no idea at all." 

Adam followed him. "I'm not the only one who's worried about you! Tommy's lost his powers before. So has Jason. You could talk to one of them!" 

Rocky grabbed the orange juice from the refrigerator and slammed the door. "Yeah, they seem to be really worried about me. They've just been banging down the door to help me, haven't they?" He sat down at the table, opening the newspaper to the Real Estate section he had been perusing the day before. 

"How are they supposed to when you're never around? You've been totally avoiding..." Adam's eyes feel on the page that Rocky was browsing. "Apartments? What are you looking at that for?" 

"I'm looking for my own place. So I can take my moping someplace where it won't bother you so much." He scoffed at Adam's shocked gaze. "Don't worry about the rent. I'm sure Tommy would be more than happy to move in with you. He spends more time here than he does at his own house." 

Adam sputtered for a few moments, looking at his roommate in total bewilderment. "What the hell is wrong with you?" 

"What's wrong with me?" Rocky glared at him with more anger than he could ever remember having at Adam. "You're right, I do have a problem. I've been having it for two months now. But my supposed 'best friends' don't give a damn!" 

"That's not fair! We tried to be supportive of you, to help you out. But you completely shut us out! How are we supposed to help you when you won't even talk to us?" 

"How am I supposed to talk to you about my life when the only thing I ever hear about are your amazing new powers, or your incredible weapons, or your kick-ass zords?! I'd probably have to get kidnapped by Divatox to even get your attention!!" 

"Well why the hell couldn't you just tell me that? You've been ignoring me for two months, Rocky. I can't read your mind; you have to let me in on what you're thinking!" 

"Maybe that's the problem! You used to have no problem knowing what I was thinking - most of the time you knew what was wrong before I did. Just admit it, Adam; I have no place in your life anymore!!" 

"That's not true!" Adam looked at him desperately. "You're still my best friend!" 

"No, I'm not. The blue ranger was your best friend. Not me." 

"Rocky, you're more than just a power ranger!" There were tears in Adam's eyes. "I love you!" 

_No!! I will not let him make me feel guilty! This is not my fault!_ Rocky stood up quickly, and winced at the pain that shot through his back. Adam moved to help him, but Rocky pushed him away. "NO! Just leave me alone!" He turned quickly to hide the tears that were mounting in his own eyes. "It's too late. We stopped being friends a long time ago and became teammates. I'm not part of the team any more. Just leave me alone!" _Get out of here! Get out of here before he has a chance to change your mind._ He ran out of the apartment and slammed the door before Adam could say another word. 

Adam stood there in shock, staring after the man that he thought was his best friend. "What the hell just happened here?" 

Rocky's stamina held out for six blocks before the pain in his back grew too sharp to bear. He slowed his jarring run, catching his breath. By now he was fairly sure that Adam wasn't going to come after him. _What the hell happened back there?_

As he walked to haze of anger cleared from his mind. _God, you're an idiot! He was trying to help you! Why did you push him away?_ In the back of his mind he knew the answer. He had no desire to get off the self-destructive path his life had become. In his heart, he'd already given up. _I gave up that day in the hospital room._ Memories of that day filled his mind… 

**********

As Rocky stared at the stunned boy, one phrase ran through his mind. _Oh shit._

"You guys are the Power Rangers?" the boy repeated. "Oh man, this is so cool! How did you get to be a Power Ranger? Was it aliens?" 

"Justin..." Rocky attempted, but the boy didn't acknowledge him. 

"How long have you been doing this? Do you have a secret hideout? I knew you guys had a secret. What do you..." 

"JUSTIN!" Rocky's tone was sharp, cutting through Justin's excitement. "Just be quiet for a minute, I need to think." He tried to filter the situation through the haze of drugs and pain that clouded his brain. _Zordon. I need to call Zordon._

He looked at the boy standing next to his bed, nearly bursting with excitement. "Justin, I want you to listen to me, and do exactly what I say. Can you do that?" 

Justin nodded emphatically, his eyes glowing. _Lord, I could tell him to go and jump off a bridge and he'd do it._ Rocky sighed. "On the back of the door is my jacket. In the pocket of my jacket is my wallet. I want you to take it, go down to the cafeteria and buy yourself lunch. Now here's the tricky part. Are you listening?" Justin nodded again. Rocky spoke the next part very slowly and clearly. "DON'T TALK TO ANYONE! Unless it's to the servers in the cafeteria to get food, I don't want you to say a word to anyone. Got it?" 

"Go get lunch and don't talk to anyone," the boy replied. 

"Good. Now go. I don't want to see you back here for at least an hour." 

Walking, or rather bouncing, to the door, Justin retrieved the wallet and walked out. 

Wincing a bit with the effort, Rocky activated his communicator. "Zordon, I have a problem." 

An hour later Justin poked his head in the door. "Can I come back now?" 

"Come on in," Rocky said. 

Justin walked into the hospital room, doing his best to hide his great excitement. "Are you going to tell me about the Power Rangers now?" 

"Yes." Rocky pointed to the plastic chair that sat in the corner of the room. "Why don't you pull that chair over here and sit down." 

Justin did as he was told, then looked expectantly at Rocky. The Blue Zeo Ranger took a deep breath. "Tommy, Adam, Tanya, Kat and I are the Power Rangers." 

"This is so cool," Justin exclaimed. 

"Justin, this is very privileged information. If people learned our identities it would put both them and us in danger. This has to remain a secret. Do you understand?" 

Justin nodded. "I won't tell anyone, I promise." 

_He really is a good kid._ Rocky smiled at the younger boy. _I trust that he'll keep our secret safe._ "Why don't you hang out here for a while? We can watch some TV. 

Justin's eyes lit up, and he nodded. "That would be cool." 

**********

Rocky awoke to the familiar tone of his communicator. "What is it, Zordon," he asked groggily. Vaguely he registered Justin looking up from his book, curiosity painting his face. 

"ROCKY, WE HAVE ENCOUNTERED A NEW ENEMY THAT PUTS THE EARTH IN GRAVE DANGER. I FEAR THAT THE RANGERS WILL NOT BE ABLE TO COMPLETE THEIR MISSION IF THEY ARE ONE RANGER SHORT." 

"Just tell me what you want me to do, Zordon. I'll do anything in my power to help them." 

"THAT IS GOOD TO HEAR, BECAUSE I AM ABOUT TO ASK YOU TO DO THE MOST DIFFICULT TASK IN A RANGER'S CAREER. I AM GOING TO ASK YOU TO PASS THE POWER TO A NEW BEARER." 

Rocky felt a knot form in his stomach. Give up the power? That had only ever been an option in his nightmares. _But if it's what I have to do to help my friends..._ He took a deep breath, centering himself. "What do I have to do?" 

"IS JUSTIN STILL THERE WITH YOU?" 

Rocky looked over at the boy in surprise. "Yes." 

"WOULD HE BE WILLING TO ACCEPT THE RESPONSIBILITIES OF BEING A POWER RANGER?" 

Rocky's eyes widened. "What?!!" 

Justin leapt off the chair. "Would I!!" 

"Zordon, he's just a kid!" 

"AS ARE THE REST OF YOU. I TRUST HE WILL HANDLE THE POWER IN THE SAME MATURE AND RESPONSIBLE WAY ALL OF MY RANGERS HAVE." 

_Speaking of other Rangers...I just can't see Tommy and Adam being okay with this replacement._ "Do the others know about this?" 

"I HAVE NOT YET INFORMED THEM OF MY CHOICE, BUT I TRUST THAT THEY WILL SEE THE SAME PROMISE IN JUSTIN THAT I DO." 

_I'm not so sure about that. Tanya and Kat already have to watch Justin in their off time, I don't think they want to have to do it in the middle of a fight._ He sighed. _But I don't think they're going to get much of a choice._ Rocky looked over at the youth, whose face was glowing with excitement. _Damn it Zordon, did you have to bring this up while he was standing right here?_

"I can do it Rocky, I know that I can!!" 

"Being a Power Ranger isn't easy, Justin. It's something that you have to devote your whole life to. You have to be ready for a fight 24 hours a day, seven days a week. You have to accept that you can't save everyone. And most importantly, it means that your life has to become a secret to anyone around you other than the other Rangers." 

"I'll be a great Power Ranger. I won't let you down, I promise!" 

Rocky sighed. "If that's what you think is best Zordon, that's what I'll do. You're better qualified to choose a new Ranger than I am." 

"I AM PROUD OF YOUR HANDLING OF THIS SITUATION, ROCKY. YOU HAVE ONCE AGAIN DEMONSTRATED A MATURITY FAR BEYOND YOUR YEARS. IS JUSTIN PREPARED FOR TELEPORTATION?" 

Rocky looked intently at Justin. "Are you sure that you want to do this? This is a life-changing decision." 

The boy nodded enthusiastically. "You won't be disappointed." 

The Blue Zeo Ranger nodded. "He's ready." Justin grinned, giving him a thumbs-up as he disappeared in a shower of white sparks. Rocky stared at the empty space left behind. "Zordon, I really hope you know what you're doing." 

**********

Rocky found he had unconsciously steered himself to the bluffs, his favorite thinking place. _It's not like Justin has brought about the doom of the Power Rangers. He's actually handled himself fairly well, especially for a kid. Maybe that's part of the problem._ Not that he'd wished doom for the boy, but it was disconcerting to see Justin filling his shoes. Worse, filling them more than adequately. 

He crouched down, staring out at the endless blue expanse._Adam's right. I have pushed everyone away. I closed myself off from all of my friends. And now I'm left here, alone._ He closed his eyes to the tears that threatened to spill over. It was bad enough that he'd lost his family once, here he had gone and pushed away the new family he had found. _I'm such an idiot._ Picking up a pebble, he stood and threw it as hard as he could into the ocean. He felt pain lance through his back, and gritted his teeth in frustration. "Damn it!!" he yelled. 

"Rocky?" He jumped at the familiar accented voice, turning to see a pink clad woman behind him. 

"Kat." He turned back towards the ocean. "What are you doing here?" 

"Just taking a walk. I needed some fresh air." She walked over to stand beside him. "I haven't seen you in a while. How have you been?" 

"Just peachy," he replied sarcastically. 

She didn't comment on the tone. "I was hoping to see you at my recital yesterday." 

"Maybe if you'd looked you would have." Out of the corner of his eye he saw the hurt that flashed across her face, and instantly regretted his cynicism. Turning to her, he sighed. "I'm sorry. It's been a really bad week." 

"Anything I can help with?" she asked, instant forgiveness in her eyes. 

He sighed. "I don't know that anyone can help me. I think I'm beyond help." 

She laughed softly, and he felt the familiar flutter in his stomach, the one he always felt around her. "No one's beyond help, Rocky. All you have to do is ask for it." 

He smiled slightly. "Thanks. I guess I do need someone to talk to." 

"Good," she replied. "That's what friends are for." 

"Well, I like to think of myself as a friend. A friend that's been a bit of an asshole the past few months..." 

She took his hand and squeezed it. "Nonsense. Everyone needs time away to sort things out." She sighed. "I certainly do." 

"Would you rather be alone? I can leave." He tried to withdraw his hand, but she held it tightly. 

"No. It's not you I need time away from." She stared out at the deep blue water. "It's Tommy." 

*********

To be continued... 


	4. Not So Perfect Life

_**Disclaimer:** I do not own the Power Rangers, I just borrow them from time to time. _

_**Author's notes: **I know it's been forever since I updated this story, and I'm really, really sorry. Life just gets kinda crazy sometimes - and I do as well!! I have gotten a few requests to make this an Adam/Rocky romance, but this one's just about their awesome friendship. Thanks to all who read and review - please keep doing so!! I promise the next update won't take so long._

**Not So Perfect Life  
****by: Hazydestiny**

"No. It's not you I need time away from." She stared out at the deep blue water. "It's Tommy."

Rocky looked at her in surprise. "Tommy? I thought things were great between you two. You looked so happy together last night."

"Looks can be deceiving. We put on a good show. Everyone else thinks we're perfectly fine as well."

"But in reality..." He took a deep breath, attempting to ignore the part of him that actually _was_ hoping this was true. "You're having problems with your relationship?"

She sighed. "In order for us to have problems with our relationship we'd actually have to have a relationship."

Rocky looked at her, thoroughly confused. "I don't follow."

She shook her head and pulled her hand away. "Never mind. You have enough problems to deal with, you don't need to play Dear Abby to me."

He caught her hand. "No, I want to. That's what friends are for, right?" He smiled at her. "Besides, it would do me good to get my mind off of my problems for a bit."

She returned the smile with a small one of her own. "It could take a while."

Rocky shrugged. "I'm not going anywhere."

"Okay." She sighed. "Where should I start..."

Kat opened her eyes to the bright morning sun shining through the windows. She swung her legs over the side of the bed and sat up, checking the clock as she did so. It was 6:15. That meant that she had 45 minutes before the alarm went off and she had to share the bathroom. Stretching her arms over her head, she glanced down at the still figure next to her in the bed. Tommy was dead to the world.

Getting to her feet she walked sleepily to the bathroom. She turned on the water in the shower, letting it warm as she brushed her teeth. When she could see the steam rising she pulled off the oversized t-shirt she slept in and stepped in. Closing her eyes, she let the hot spray of water ease the sleep from her muscles and get her ready for the day ahead.

As per her usual morning ritual, she ran the schedule of the day through her mind. It was a normal Saturday - she had two dance classes to teach at the Youth Center, and then she and Tommy were planning to take Justin hiking. _Nothing like a nice family outing for another perfect weekend._

Turning the water off, she grabbed a towel and wrapped it around herself. The alarm was going off in the bedroom, and she heard a moan from Tommy. Savoring the final moment of solitude, she wiped the steam off the mirror and looked at her reflection. "It's going to be a good day," she whispered. "You are going to smile and have fun and be happy." She ignored the voice in her head that said otherwise.

"Morning," Tommy mumbled, shuffling into the bathroom.

She gave him a smile. "Sleep well?"

"Like a rock." He reached over and grabbed his razor. "You?"

"Wonderful." She moved past him to return to the bedroom. Opening the top dresser drawer she pulled out warm-up pants and a leotard. She pulled a t-shirt over her head just as Tommy emerged from the bathroom.

"Class this morning?" he asked, grabbing a red t-shirt from the drawer.

"Two," she replied, pulling her dance bag out of the closet.

"You'll be back here by 11, right?"

Turning her back to him, she rolled her eyes. "Don't worry, I haven't forgotten. I'll be here."

"Good." He walked out of the bedroom, and she heard the TV in the kitchen turn on. As it was almost always set to Speedvision, she figured he was watching a race. _I'll never understand how anyone can find a bunch of cars driving in a circle exciting._

She finished gathering her things and zipped the bag up. Shouldering it, she walked out of the bedroom and stuck her head in the kitchen. Just as she had suspected Tommy was eating cereal out of a bowl, his eyes glued to the television. "See you later," she said, grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl. The only response she received was a grunt. With a sigh she left the apartment.

Kat pulled up to the building at 11:20. She noticed Justin and Tommy sparring on the lawn. Pulling into her parking spot, she grabbed her bag and got out of the car. Her boyfriend looked up as she approached the pair. "You're late."

"I know, I'm sorry. One of the kids got picked up really late, and I had to hang around until her mom showed up." She accepted the hug from Justin and smiled at him. "Let me change real quick and we can go?"

"Sure!" the younger boy replied. "Tommy's showing me some new moves."

"Great. I'll be right down."

"Don't take too long," Tommy added, ignoring the sharp look given to him before Kat proceeded up the stairs to their apartment.

Five minutes later she met the two in the yard, having changed into her hiking clothes. She had a backpack slung over her shoulder, containing snacks, water, and sunscreen. "Okay, let's go!"

The hike itself was fairly pleasant. The day was bright and clear, and the desert was always beautiful. Justin babbled happily about school and rangering, asking as always about the experiences of the "veteran" rangers. Tommy told most of the stories, Kat getting in a sentence or two when she could. The rest of the time she just listened to the exchange between the two of them.

She had to admit, she admired how much Tommy had supported the boy since he joined the team. He was always around to teach him some new moves or help out in the power chamber, and often allowed him to hang out while the older man worked on cars, or even the zords. She, on the other hand, was the one to help him with his homework or listen to stories of his day. The three of them went hiking almost every weekend, and often took one night a week to catch a movie. Adam and Tanya joined them when they had free time, but mainly the three of them were a unit.

_One big, happy family. _She tried to banish the bitter, sarcastic tinge that came with that thought, but found it difficult. Nowadays the only time that she and Tommy even had a conversation was when it involved Justin. Of course, there were always the lovely recaps she got to have with him after battle. _Sitting around while he identifies the failure or success of every battle strategy, and every weakness that we need to fix before the next encounter. Yeah, that's a great basis for a relationship._

Just then her boyfriend's voice broke through her thoughts. "Hey, Kat, you okay?"

She looked at him in surprise. "Yeah, I'm fine. Why?"

"You look like you're a million miles away." There was actually a note of concern in his voice.

_And therein lies the problem. _She smiled at him. "I'm fine. I've just got a lot on my mind, with work and stuff. Don't worry about it."

"Okay." He returned his attention to the story Justin was relaying about a fight he helped break up at school.

Kat sighed. This was what made her relationship decisions so complicated. It's not that Tommy was a bad guy. He wasn't at all. She still remembered all of the reasons why she'd fallen for him in the first place. And she knew that he loved her. He didn't ignore her purposefully. It just...happened. Somehow that's where their relationship had taken them.

Plus there was the factor of Justin. Ever since he had joined the ranger team, she and Tommy had become like surrogate parents for him. He had been through so much in his life, first with his mother's death and then losing his father, and she felt a strong responsibility for him. What would happen if his new family suddenly just dissolved? Where would that leave him?

All of these thoughts raced through her mind as the hot sun beat down on her, and with a sigh she did her best to push them away. There would be time later to think about her life. For now she convinced herself to enjoy the rest of the hike and place her attention on her companions.

Kat stopped talking and glanced at Rocky, who was still looking at her intently. "And that's where I am right now. I feel like I'm stuck on this merry-go-round that's gone out of control, and I just can't get off."

He smiled. "That's quite a metaphor." She didn't reply, and he squeezed her hand. "I'm sorry. This isn't the time for jokes."

"No, it's okay. You always were good at picking us up when things got rough. No matter what the situation, you could always find the bright side." She gave him a small smile. "I've missed that."

His gaze returned to the ocean. "Yeah," he said softly. He tried to keep the bitter tinge out of his voice, but found it impossible.

She picked up on the negative vibe that suddenly came from her companion. "I'm sorry, Rocky. Here I am going on about this stupid relationship dilemma, when you have real problems to deal with. I can't imagine the struggle you've gone through in the past few months. I must seem totally insensitive."

He looked back at her. "No, not at all. Actually, it's nice to get my mind off mine for a little bit. And like I said before, that's what friends are for, right?" _Not that my friends would know that..._ He pushed the defensive thought away, trying to focus on the woman in front of him. _Just don't think about it._

"I know, but you seemed really upset earlier. Are you sure you don't want me to lend an ear for a while?"

"It was just an argument I had with Adam this morning..." He winced at the memory of the pain on his best friend's face when he had left the apartment. "If you don't mind, I'd really rather not talk about it."

"Are you sure? It usually helps to talk to a friend..." She stopped when he pulled his hand away.

"I'm sure." He crossed his arms, moving away from her a bit. As hard as he was trying to stop it, he could feel his defenses kicking back in with her questioning. _It really helps to talk to a friend? Oh, I've had a great demonstration of that. _"Look, I appreciate the offer. It just comes a little too late to be taken seriously."

Her gaze turned questioning. "A little late? What do you mean?"

He could hear his inner conflict starting up again, but there just didn't seem to be a way to lower the wall that was suddenly rising between the two of them. _Get away, Rocky. Get away before you say something really stupid._ _Don't repeat what happened this morning. _"Never mind." He sighed. "I'm sorry you're having problems, Kat, I really am. God knows I've never wished anything but the best for you. But I'm afraid that my use as a friend wore out some time ago. And as much as I may want to stand here and pretend, that's reality." Stopping himself from getting lost in the blue depths of her eyes once more, he walked away. "Goodbye."


	5. Adam's Story

_**Disclaimer:**__ None of the characters belong to me._

_**Author's notes:**__ OK, in my little world Zordon is still there, Dimitria hasn't shown up yet. Not that I ever liked her anyway. This includes references to physical and sexual abuse, so if you're not comfortable with that don't say I didn't warn you. Feedback is much appreciated. Enjoy!_

**Adam's Story ****By: HazyDestiny**

The rangers, minus Justin, stood in the Power Chamber staring at Zordon. He had called them all there, telling them it was very important. "What's going on, Zordon?" Tommy asked.

"I HAVE A VERY DIFFICULT MISSION FOR YOU, RANGERS. YOU HAVE ALL BEEN INCREDIBLE RANGERS, AND SAVED YOUR WORLD MANY TIMES. THE PEOPLE OF EARTH OWE YOU A GREAT DEBT OF GRATITUDE. I AM VERY LUCKY TO HAVE YOU, AND COULD NOT BE PROUDER OF YOU. BUT IT HAS COME TIME FOR YOU TO MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIVES."

Adam felt a wave of shock hit him. _Move on with our lives? _"What?"

"WHAT I AM GOING TO ASK YOU TO DO IS NOT AN EASY TASK. I WOULD LIKE EACH OF YOU TO CHOOSE A SUCCESOR, SOMEONE YOU FEEL WORTHY TO TAKE YOUR POWERS. I TRUST EACH OF YOU COMPLETELY AND KNOW YOU WILL MAKE A WISE DECISION."

Adam's shock had quickly turned to panic. "Give up our powers?"

"I had a feeling you were going to ask us to do this," Tommy said.

Adam looked at him in surprise. "You did?"

Tommy nodded. "Just think about it, Adam. Kat and I are going to be in North Carolina, Tanya will be in New York…"

"And I'll be right here in Angel Grove. Why can't I stay on as a power ranger?"

"YOU WILL BE IN COLLEGE, ADAM," Zordon boomed. "IT'S A MUCH MORE DEMANDING ENVIRONMENT THAN HIGH SCHOOL."

"Zordon, I'm going to Angel Grove Community College. It's not exactly Harvard."

"IT IS STILL A CHALLENGING STEP TOWARDS YOUR FUTURE, AND I CANNOT ALLOW THE PRESSURE OF BEING A RANGER AT THE SAME TIME TO INTERFERE WITH THAT."

Adam felt the panic coursing through his body. _He can't take my powers away, he can't!_ "But I want the pressure of being a ranger!" He looked at his friends. "Help me out here!"

Tommy shook his head. "Sorry, buddy, I gotta agree with Zordon on this one."

"We all love being rangers, Adam, but it's time to move on," Kat said.

"Yeah, protecting the earth is important, but our lives are important too," Tanya added.

Adam gaped at them. "I can't believe you guys are okay with this! We're talking about giving up our powers here!"

"I UNDERSTAND THIS IS DIFFICULT FOR YOU, ADAM, AND I APPRECIATE THAT BEING A RANGER IS SO IMPORTANT TO YOU. HOWEVER, THIS IS NOT A REQUEST. IF YOU ARE UNWILLING I WILL HAVE TOMMY FIND SOMEONE TO TAKE THE GREEN POWERS, BUT I WOULD MUCH PREFER YOU TO DO IT."

Adam closed his eyes in defeat. _Looks like this is happening whether I like it or not. _"If that's what you want me to do I'll do it. But that doesn't mean that I'm going to be happy about it."

"NOR DO I EXPECT YOU TO. BUT PASSING THE POWERS ON IS A STEP YOU MUST TAKE."

Adam sighed. "I understand that."

"GOOD." Zordon nodded. "THANK YOU RANGERS. I LEAVE THE CHOICE IN YOUR CAPABLE HANDS."

The other rangers started talking about who they were going to choose to take their powers. Adam slipped out of the Power Chamber. Once outside, he sat down and looked out across the desert. _How am I supposed to choose someone to take my powers? Other than my friends they're the most important thing in the world to me. _He closed his eyes. _I've seen Rocky go through the hell of losing his powers. Now I'm supposed to go through that, willingly? _Thinking of Rocky made the memory of their fight that morning surface, and he winced.

A voice behind him made him open his eyes. "You okay, Adam?"

He didn't look back. "That's a stupid question, Tommy."

"Sorry." The red ranger sat down next to him. "Wanna talk about it?"

"How can you be so okay with giving up your powers like this? I mean, you've been a ranger longer than any of us. How are you just moving on without any complaint?"

"It's hard for me too, Adam. Being a ranger is very important to me. But there's no way I could be a ranger and be at college. It's just not possible. And I need to think about my future. I can't just be a ranger my whole life."

Adam finally looked at him. "And what if I want to be a ranger my whole life?"

"There's no way Zordon would let us do that. He wants us to have a future outside of rangering. You have to admit, it's a pretty time-consuming job. There's no way we could go to college, or have jobs, or even get married and have a family while being rangers. Especially with not being able to tell anyone who we are."

Adam sighed. "I know. I just…I can't imagine my life without the power."

"Neither can I. But like Zordon said, it's a step we have to take." He smiled. "And personally, I think this is a good time to take that step."

"I don't."

"I know. But Zordon's not giving us a choice here. This is something that we have to do."

Adam just sighed.

Tommy cocked his head, analyzing his friend. "This isn't all that's bothering you, is it?"

Adam glanced at him. "I had no idea you were so perceptive," he said sarcastically.

"I have my moments." He put his hand on Adam's shoulder. "What's up?"

Adam closed his eyes. "Rocky and I had a fight this morning."

"You and Rocky? Really?"

Adam looked at him, a small smile on his face at that reaction. "Yeah, I know. We hardly ever fight. But this morning…" His smile disappearing, he proceeded to tell Tommy everything that had happened that morning.

"Wow," Tommy said when he was through.

"Yeah. And the thing is, it's my fault! I'm the one who hasn't been paying attention to what he needs. Hell, I've practically ignored him for two months."

Tommy squeezed his shoulder. "You haven't been ignoring him. You've been giving him space. There's a difference. And you did it because you thought that was what he needed."

"Yeah, but it wasn't what he needed, and I should've known that. We've always been able to read each other, to tell what the other one needs. I should've known!"

"People change, Adam. They grow apart. That's part of life."

Adam shook his head fiercely. "Not me and Rocky. We've always been there for each other. Hell, I wouldn't even be alive if it wasn't for him!"

Tommy looked at him strangely. "What do you mean by that?"

Adam considered him for a moment. "Well, you've been my friend long enough. I guess it's okay to tell you my history. But don't tell the girls, all right? The last thing I need is for the sympathy parade to start." Tommy nodded, and Adam launched into his story.

"When I was little my dad used to abuse me. Sometimes he was drunk, sometimes he wasn't – it didn't really matter, he just enjoyed beating the hell out of me. At night, when he was finally asleep, I would sneak out of the house and go over to Rocky's. He would just clean me up, then hold me until I fell 

asleep. We'd wake up really early in the morning and I'd run back to my house before my dad woke up. That was our nightly routine."

"Oh man," Tommy said.

"When I was 11, my mom died. She was shot while I was at school. All the police reports said it was suicide, but I know better."

"You think your dad shot her."

"I know my dad shot her. But considering the fact that my dad was an upstanding police officer, no one would dream of suspecting him."

Tommy looked at him incredulously. "Your dad was a police officer?"

"Yep. Still is, as far as I know."

"Oh man," Tommy said again.

"I never would've been able to get through that without Rocky. He and his family were amazing. It was their love and support that got me through it. But especially Rocky."

Adam took a deep breath. "A year later Rocky's dad was killed. He was hit by a car and died from massive internal injuries. The police said it was a drunk driver, but I have other theories."

"Your dad again?" Tommy said quietly.

Adam nodded. "The beatings had gotten worse since my mom died. I think Rocky's dad confronted my dad, and my dad shut him up. Permanently." A tear ran down his face. "After that I wanted nothing more than to just leave. I thought I'd been enough trouble, that I wasn't doing anyone any good by being around. Rocky made me promise to stay." Another tear. "He made me promise we'd be together forever." His voice caught.

Tommy said nothing, just put his arm around Adam's shoulders and let him collect himself before he continued his story.

"About two years later the sexual abuse started. That was when I first tried to kill myself. Mostly pills, I really wasn't brave enough to do anything else. Rocky and Aisha kept trying to get me to stop, but I tried four times." He smiled slightly. "I guess I just wasn't very good at it."

"Thank God," Tommy murmured.

Adam smiled at him, then his face turned serious again. "Then one night when I was 15 he came into my room very angry about something that had happened at work. That was the first night he really, truly raped me. It was very rough, and more painful and demeaning than anything I had been through. That night I slit my wrists." Tommy's arm tightened around his shoulder. "Rocky was worried when I didn't show up at his house that night. He came over and found me lying in a pool of blood."

"Oh Lord," Tommy said.

"He called 911 and had them come without the sirens, saying he didn't want to wake the neighborhood. Really he didn't want to wake my dad. When the EMTs got there Rocky was waiting outside with me. They stabilized me, then Rocky had them drive me to Angel Grove Hospital."

"Which is where you met my mom."

"Yep. And for some reason Rocky trusted your mom and told her what was going on, and his and Aisha's plan. Apparently they had been working on this whole running away bit for a while and didn't tell me because they knew I would tell them no, to stay with their families. Which is exactly what I did say. But Rocky knew this was to only way to save my life. So we did it."

"And my mom helped you guys find a place to live and get into school."

Adam nodded. "Luckily apartments in Angel Grove aren't that expensive. However, my mom left me quite a bit of money that my dad didn't even know she had – enough to get an apartment and pay living expenses." He sighed. "Rocky hasn't seen or talked to his family in three years, and they were so important to him."

"You're important to him, Adam. It sounds like Rocky would do anything for you."

Another tear ran down Adam's face. "I know he would. He did. He gave up his life for me. And I completely let him down."

Tommy squeezed his shoulders. "It's not your fault. You did what you thought was best for him. That's all anyone can ask."

"But it wasn't enough!" Adam finally broke down, sobbing. "I can't lose him, Tommy, I can't! He's more than my best friend, he's the most important person in the world to me! I can't get through this life without him! And especially now that we're losing our powers – I need him, Tommy! I can't lose him!"

Tommy gently held his friend. "Then tell him that. Tell him he's the most important person in the world to you. Let him know that you still need him. Something tells me Rocky would never abandon you."

Adam just nodded, sobbing in Tommy's arms. They stayed like that for a while until Adam stopped crying. He pulled away, wiping his cheeks. "Sorry," he said. "I haven't done that in a while. _And usually it's Rocky holding me._

Tommy smiled. "Then maybe you needed to."

"I guess so." Adam smiled at him. "Thanks."

"Anytime." Tommy put his hand on Adam's shoulder. "Talk to him, Adam. I know you can work this out."

Adam nodded. "I'm gonna go home now."

"Good idea. I'll see you later?" Adam nodded again, and they stood up. "You know, you and Rocky should come to North Carolina and visit me and Kat. I hear Raleigh's a great city."

Adam smiled. "I'd like that." He stepped back. "Thanks again, Tommy." In a shower of green sparks he teleported away.


	6. Coming Home

_Disclaimer: We've been through this already. They don't belong to me._

_Author's Notes: Thank you, thank you, thank you to my darling Ivydraken, who is helping me make this story more believable. I love you babe. Please review! I'm already working on the next chapter, so it shouldn't be that far off._

**Coming Home**** by: Hazydestiny**

Rocky stood on the beach, staring at the water. _How could I be so stupid? Kat was offering me the perfect chance to get my feelings out, and I walked away. Plus – it's Kat! The girl I want to share everything with! God, Rocky, how could you be such a fucking idiot?_ He took a deep breath of the ocean air, letting it soothe him. _I really do need to talk to someone. But who? _There was one person he wanted to see right now, and he didn't know if she wanted to see him. After all, it had been three years. But he really needed to see her. _That's it. I'm going. I'm actually going home._ A small smile on his face, he headed back to his apartment to get the car.

An hour later he pulled into the driveway of a small house in Stone Canyon. Getting out of his car, he paused a moment to take everything in. _I've really missed this place._ Taking a deep breath, he walked up to the door and knocked. A strange man answered the door. "Yes?"

_Oh God. Did they move? _"Um…I'm looking for Maria DeSantos?"

"She's in the kitchen. May I tell her who's calling?"

"Rocky DeSantos."

The older man's face broke into a smile. "Rocky! It's great to finally meet you!" He held out his hand. "Maria's told me so much about you, I feel like I know you already."

Rocky shook his hand. "Can I ask who you are?"

The man laughed. "Oh, I'm sorry. I'm Jack Cader, Maria's husband."

Rocky froze. "What?"

Jack smiled. "I probably should've let your mother tell you that. We got married a year and a half ago."

Rocky just stared at him in shock. "A year and a half?"

"Yes. I'm very sorry you couldn't make the wedding, but I understand why. I appreciate you trying to keep your friends and family safe."

"I…"

He was cut off by someone throwing themselves at him. "Rocky!"

He looked down at the girl wrapped around him. "Rosa?" She looked up at him and smiled, and he hugged her back. "My God, look at you. You're beautiful!"

"Thank you," she replied, hugging him tighter.

"I've missed your hugs," he murmured, holding her close.

A woman walked into the room. "Jack, who…" She stopped. "Rocky?"

He disentangled himself from his sister. "Hi, Mama."

She rushed to him, pulling him into her arms. "Oh my baby!" Tears were running down her face as she hugged him.

Rocky closed his eyes. A wave of peace washed over him. He hugged her tighter. "I've missed you so much."

"And I've missed you." She pulled away and took his face into her hands, tears still running down her cheeks. "Look at you. Turned from a child into a handsome young man. You look wonderful."

Rocky felt tears pricking at his own eyes. "And you look as beautiful as always."

She smiled. "Thank you, baby." She pulled him back into her arms.

An angry voice interrupted them. "What is he doing here?"

Rocky pulled away from his mother, taking a deep breath to hold back the torrent of emotions threatening to break loose. He looked up to see his younger brother standing in the doorway, looking extremely pissed. "Hey, Juan."

Juan walked into the room, glaring at him. "Don't you dare hey Juan me. What the hell are you doing here?"

"Juan! Don't you speak to your brother like that!" Maria said sharply.

Juan laughed bitterly. "Brother? He's not my brother. A brother wouldn't abandon me at 13 with six brothers and sisters. A brother wouldn't go three years without so much as a word. He is not my brother."

Rocky held up his hands. "Look, I understand you're angry, and I don't blame you. But let's talk about it like adults. You are 16 now."

"Talk? There's nothing to talk about. You abandoned us. For Adam. Poor, defenseless Adam, who had a black belt but couldn't defend himself against his stupid father. He was always more important to you than your family anyway."

Rocky took a step towards him. He wanted to say something to defend Adam, but decided it wouldn't be best in the situation. Instead he said, "That's not fair. This family is extremely important to me."

"Bullshit."

"Juan, that's enough!" Jack said forcefully.

Juan glared at him. "Don't tell me what to do. You are not my father."

"No, but I'm your mother, and I'm telling you to stop this now," Maria said.

Juan looked at her. "How can you be on his side? I watched you go through hell for three years not knowing if he was dead or alive. But no, that doesn't matter. Rocky, the big hero. Big hero my ass!"

"Juan, please," Rosa said quietly.

Juan glared at everyone in the room, then with an angry growl turned and stormed out. Rocky closed his eyes. "He really hates me."

"He doesn't hate you," Maria said quietly. "He's just angry."

"We all were after you left," Rosa said. She walked over to him and put her hand on his arm. "But I've had three years to think about it, and the conclusion I've reached is that what you did was very brave." She leaned up and kissed him on the cheek.

"Thanks. You don't know how much that means to me." He gave her a strained smile. "You've turned into quite the young woman, Rosa."

She grinned. "Whatever, big brother."

Rocky looked towards Jack. "Can I have some time alone with Mama?"

He smiled. "Sure. Come on Rosa, we'll go watch that movie we were talking about earlier."

Rosa hugged Rocky tightly. "Just don't leave without saying goodbye again."

He hugged her back. "I promise."

Maria put her hand on Rocky's back. "Let's go into the kitchen. I'll heat you up something to eat. "

This time Rocky's smile was a bit more genuine. "You haven't changed a bit, Mama."

They walked into the kitchen, and Rocky sat down at the table. "Where are Elana, Carlos, Jessica and the twins?"

Maria opened the fridge. "Day camp. God bless it."

"So tell me about Jack."

She smiled the smile of a woman obviously in love. "We met shortly after you left, in church choir. He's really wonderful. I was surprised how quickly I fell in love with him."

"And you got married a year and a half ago?"

"Yes. It was a very small wedding, basically just family."

"I wish I could've been there."

"Me too." She placed a plate of meatloaf in front of him and sat down on the other side of the table. "So tell me about your life."

Rocky dug in. For some reason he was suddenly starving. Plus, he'd almost forgotten how good his mother's meatloaf was. "Well, Adam and I are living in Angel Grove."

She raised an eyebrow. "Angel Grove? That must be a very interesting place to live."

_You have no idea. _"It is."

"What about Aisha?"

"She's studying with a tribe in Africa right now."

"Oh how wonderful."

"We graduated high school two months ago, and we're both going to be taking classes at Angel Grove Community College in the fall."

She looked at him, a wistful expression on her face. "Look at you, a young man. I wish I'd been there to see it."

Rocky put his fork down. "I'm sorry I left like that, Mama. I could at least have woken you up to say goodbye."

She shook her head. "I knew you were leaving at some point."

"Yeah, but you didn't know when. To wake up one morning and find me just gone, and then to spend three years not knowing where I was – that must have been hell for you."

"It was." She reached across the table and took his hand. "But I understand why you did what you did, and I'm very proud of you for doing that. You gave up your life to help a friend, and that is incredibly brave and noble."

"Thanks, Mama," he said quietly.

"And now I have one question for you." She squeezed his hand. "Are you happy? Because something in your eyes tells me otherwise."

He looked across the table, into those kind brown eyes that had always offered his so much love and support…and everything came spilling out. His back injury, losing the power (he figured he'd explain to 

Zordon later), his feelings towards Kat and his fight with Adam. When he finished he took a deep breath and looked at her. "And that's been my life lately."

She squeezed his hand again. "You've grown very strong since I've seen you last."

"I don't feel strong." He pulled his hand away. "I feel like my life's falling apart and there's nothing I can do about it."

"Talk to him."

He looked at her. "What?"

"Talk to Adam. That's what's bothering you the most, isn't it?" He nodded. "There was a time when the two of you would do anything for each other. No matter how much you've changed, I have a feeling that hasn't."

"I know it hasn't. I just don't know how to start the conversation."

"You'll figure it out." She looked at him tearily. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you when you were in the hospital."

"It's okay." He reached across the table to take her hand again. "Mama, this was a decision I made. You may have supported me in it, but ultimately it was my choice. I really missed you and the rest of the family, but I had a good life. Even though I've been having a tough time lately, I haven't regretted that choice for a second."

That statement made him pause. It was true, he hadn't ever regretted it. He had moved to an exciting new place, made incredible friends, and gotten the one-in-a-billion opportunity to be a power ranger and used his skills to defend the earth. _So why and I obsessing over all this bullshit when for the past three years I've basically lived a perfect life? _Another thought popped into his head. _And had the best friend I could ask for while doing it?_

He stood up. "I've got to go. I have to talk to Adam."

Maria stood as well. "I thought you might. Just don't forget to say goodbye to your brother and sister."

"I won't. And I promise I'll come back soon." As he headed out the kitchen door something occurred to him, and he turned. "Mama, you can't tell anyone about me being a power ranger. Not even Jack. I wasn't supposed to tell anyone, and I'm going to have an interesting time explaining to my mentor why I just blurted out our secret. So you have to promise me you won't say a word to anyone, ever."

"I won't." She walked over and folded him in her arms. "Rocky, I am so proud of you. You not only gave up your life to help Adam, but then you dedicated your new life to helping and protecting others. I just can't even tell you how proud I am."

He hugged her back tightly. "Thanks, Mama. That means a lot to me." They stood in the embrace for a few moments, then Rocky pulled away. "I better go say goodbye to Rosa and Juan. Not that Juan will want to say goodbye to me."

Maria put her hand on his shoulder. "Give him time, Rocky. Just give him time."

Rocky nodded. As the two of them walked out of the kitchen, a thought popped into his head that made him smile. _It's good to come home._


	7. Making Up

_Disclaimer: Once again the Power Rangers do not belong to me, they belong to Saban/Disney. Ugh, I've said that so many times I think I'm hearing it in my dreams._

_Author's notes: Thanks to IvyDraken, my inspiration. Thanks also for all of the awesome support and reviews – please keep them coming! _

**Making Up**

Rocky walked into the apartment and found Adam sitting on the couch. "Where have you been?" his roommate asked.

"Nowhere," he replied, walking into the kitchen. _Ok Rock, just relax. You've started a million conversations with Adam before, it's not that hard. Just start a conversation._

He needn't have worried. Adam followed him into the kitchen. "Rocky, we need to talk."

Rocky took a deep breath. "I know." He turned towards Adam. "I'm sorry I was such an asshole this morning. You didn't deserve that, you were just trying to help."

Adam looked back at him, his brown eyes filled with guilt. "And I'm sorry for being an asshole for the past two months."

"No," Rocky said. "I appreciate that you were trying to give me space. It may not have been what I needed, but I didn't tell you that."

"But I should've known!"

Rocky sighed. "Adam, you've got to learn that not everything is your fault. We've both changed a lot in three years. So we can't read each other's minds anymore, so what? I should've told you what was going on. I'm sorry."

Adam looked at him worriedly. "Did you mean what you said? About the blue ranger being my best friend? About our friendship being past tense?"

Rocky shook his head. "No. Not at all."

"Good. Because I have something to say." He took a step forward. "Rocky, you're my best friend. Not the blue ranger, **you**. You always have been, and hopefully you always will be. You saved my life, in more ways than one. I wouldn't be the person I am, at the place I'm in, with the opportunities I have, without you. And right now, I know one thing more than anything else – I don't want to lose you." He looked at him pleadingly. "I love you."

Rocky smiled, moving forward to embrace his best friend. "I love you too, Adam."

Adam let out a breath of relief, holding onto him tightly. "You really scared me this morning."

"I'm sorry. It's been harder than I thought to lose the power."

"And you were right when you said I don't know what that's like." Adam sighed. "But I'm about to find out."

Rocky pulled away, looking at him strangely. "What do you mean?"

Sitting down, Adam told him what had happened in the Power Chamber that afternoon. When he finished Rocky looked at him incredulously. "Zordon's making you give up your powers?"

"And choose someone else to take them."

Rocky sat down across from him. "I'm sorry, Adam. I know how much being a ranger means to you." Adam nodded, but didn't comment. "So who are you going to choose?"

The green ranger sighed. "I don't know. I know this sounds incredibly self-centered, but who's good enough to take the green powers? And it's obvious Zordon wants us to choose someone younger."

"Like Justin?"

Adam smiled. "I think I'll go a little older than Justin. I mean, he's a great ranger, but he's also a pretty unique kid. You don't exactly find intelligence like that in normal kids his age."

"You don't usually find intelligence like that in normal kids our age," Rocky replied.

Adam laughed. "Very true. Justin's pretty incredible."

Rocky took his best friend's hand. "I'm not gonna pretend it's easy losing the power. It's one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with. But I'll be here for you, all the way."

Adam smiled. "Just like you've always been." He shook his head. "I just can't believe Zordon's making us do this!"

Rocky nodded. "It stinks. But as hard as it is to admit it, he's right. College is a much more challenging environment than high school."

Adam sighed. "I know. It's just…how am I supposed to choose a power ranger?"

"I don't know. But I'll help you in whatever way I can." Rocky took a deep breath. "As to where I was earlier? I went to see my mom."

Adam looked at him in shock. "You went home?" Rocky nodded. "Rocky, that's great! How was it?"

"Well, I got to meet my mom's new husband."

Adam gaped at him. "Her new what?"

Rocky smiled. "Exactly my reaction. He seems all right, though. Jack is his name. I suppose he's not so new – they got married a year and a half ago."

Adam was quiet for a few moments, then said the only word that came to his mind. "Damn."

"And Juan's really pissed at me for leaving. He went off on me and then wouldn't speak to me for the rest of the afternoon. Rosa was happy to see me though. You should see her, Adam, she's beautiful."

Adam smiled. "I bet she is. Did you see Carlos, Elana, Jessica and the twins?"

Rocky shook his head. "They were at day camp." He looked at the table. "But I think you should know I told my mom everything."

Adam looked at him curiously. "What do you mean?"

"Our fight, liking Kat, losing the power…"

"Whoa, stop right there," Adam said. "You told her you were a power ranger?" Rocky nodded. "Rocky!"

Rocky looked at him defensively. "Come on, Adam, I had to talk to somebody. And I didn't go there with the intention of telling her, but we were talking and everything just sort of spilled out. Besides, it's not like she's going to tell anyone."

Adam sighed. "I know. It's just…"

"We're not supposed to reveal our identities to anyone. I know that."

Adam looked at him. "We're going to have to alert the other rangers to the fact that she knows."

"I realize that, and I'll tell them." They sat in silence for a few moments, each lost in their own thoughts. Then Rocky said quietly, "I had to talk to someone."

Adam reached across the table and placed his hand over Rocky's. "I just wish you'd felt you could've talked to me."

Rocky nodded. "I know. I was an idiot. Both you and Kat gave me the perfect opportunity to talk about how I felt, and I ran away."

Adam gave him a confused look. "Both me and Kat?"

"Yeah. I ran into Kat on the bluffs this morning after I left the apartment. We had a little talk." Briefly, he summed up the conversation he had had with the pink ranger.

"So things aren't all sunshine and roses for the perfect couple."

"I guess not."

Adam gave him a searching gaze. "Are you going to talk to her?"

Rocky looked at him questioningly. "About what?"

Adam rolled his eyes. "About how you feel, you dolt!"

Rocky looked at him in horror. "I can't do that! Just because she's not happy with Tommy doesn't mean I should just barge in and try to take over!"

"That's not what I'm saying." Adam sighed. "Rocky, I've been watching this torture you since you met Kat. If you let her leave without telling her how you feel, you're never going to forgive yourself."

Rocky closed his eyes. "I know. It's just…I don't know what to say to her!" He shook his head. "I can't."

Adam looked at him thoughtfully. "Tell you what. Tommy and I are going rock-climbing tomorrow. Why don't you go over there? You can at least explain why you walked away today. After that, you can just go with it as it comes. If you end up telling her, fine. If you don't, at least you talked to her."

Rocky looked at him for a few moments before answering. "Let me think about it, okay? I mean, I do want to explain why I was such a jerk today. But…" He sighed. "Just let me think about it?"

Adam held up his hands. "Hey, I'm not trying to push you into anything. I just think it's a good idea, that's all." Looking at the stress in Rocky's eyes he decided it was a good time to change the subject. "So this kid in my karate class today…"

Rocky turned the idea over in his mind. He did really want to explain to Kat why he had just walked away. _And after that I can just take it as it comes, like Adam said. Maybe I will go talk to her. But I'm not gonna think about it right now. _He sat back to enjoy an afternoon of conversation with his best friend, something he had sorely missed.


End file.
